Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
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and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
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bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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