All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Randomize
