Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
