Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
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Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
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Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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