So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize