Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
