I could have mohawked her pubes.
im six kinds of drunk right now
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
