Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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