i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
