Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
