I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
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