Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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