Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I'm gonna fight the coyote
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
