I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
