I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
