Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
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A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
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I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
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