Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
