u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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