Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
