we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
