During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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