I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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