Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
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call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
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You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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