my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
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