a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
