why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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