Texts From Last Night

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  (209): View more from California

  yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.

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  (209): yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room. http://tfl.nu/6bc3
  Replies (6) Good night (606) Bad night (3550)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  You're the end to all my bad dreams.

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?

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  (775): You're the end to all my bad dreams. (702): Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again? http://tfl.nu/buiw
  Replies (6) Good night (743) Bad night (1955)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!

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  (734): SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO! http://tfl.nu/43s5
  Replies (100) Good night (990) Bad night (22383)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.

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  (704): I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead. http://tfl.nu/olst
  Replies (39) Good night (5403) Bad night (699)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  dibs on John Mayer's hood pass

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  (267): dibs on John Mayer's hood pass http://tfl.nu/rqbz
  Replies (35) Good night (2629) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.

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  (805): my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad. http://tfl.nu/fiwi
  Replies (43) Good night (1388) Bad night (14316)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'

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  (732): I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.' http://tfl.nu/iq97
  Replies (27) Good night (1468) Bad night (5172)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.

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  (910): I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight. http://tfl.nu/7vg9
  Replies (14) Good night (5324) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs

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  (678): Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs http://tfl.nu/z2xs
  Replies (2) Good night (1144) Bad night (1924)
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  (949): View more from California

  he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect

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  (949): he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect http://tfl.nu/b9u3
  Replies (5) Good night (2333) Bad night (1117)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?

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  (248): Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain? http://tfl.nu/gohm
  Replies (10) Good night (2483) Bad night (1028)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?

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  (613): Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like? http://tfl.nu/rl24
  Replies (8) Good night (1949) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Life is too short to have fake orgasms.

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  (412): Life is too short to have fake orgasms. http://tfl.nu/1oh4
  Replies (14) Good night (2783) Bad night (512)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze

  (713): View more from Texas

  My liver has a boner

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  (832): But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze (713): My liver has a boner http://tfl.nu/y8xq
  Replies (3) Good night (1307) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.

  (574): View more from Indiana

  Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.

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  (419): I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama. (574): Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts. http://tfl.nu/mgxx
  Replies (1) Good night (1302) Bad night (304)

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