Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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