I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
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You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
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We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?