God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize