so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
