Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
