discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
