if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
