ugly people sure do ruin things
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
