I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
