physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Randomize