i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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