So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
