I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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