some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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