She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
