That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
