Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
