Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Randomize
