My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
