those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
