I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
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