Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
