I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
