what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
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You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
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So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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